16 Truths in Dealing with Sober Reality

The hard part about sobriety is that you have to deal with life and other people as they really are, and you have to do this sober, to find similar posts click here.

I’ve found the following to be true for me:

  1. It hasn’t gotten much easier.
  2. Most people are pretty boring – having said that, I do make a game out of it to spice it up and do usually find out interesting things about people or myself.
  3. I have little tolerance for annoying people – this has always been the case, but the level of annoying-ness soars when I’m sober, especially when the irritating party is drinking.
  4. I have little tolerance for people who don’t follow through with their own goals – I am so damn proud of myself for being able to do this day in and day out, I really don’t understand people who refuse to change their lives for the better. My lack of understanding surely leads to the intolerance, I’ll admit. Sure, we all get comfortable being uncomfortable at times, but I don’t get these people: People who bitch about being fat and do little about it just baffle my mind; People who hate their job, but don’t even look for a new one, willing to just be miserable for their short, precious lives; People who make New Years resolutions. Seriously, they’re kidding themselves if they wait to do it; People who drink all the way to the front door of rehab…you know that’s not going to end well. If you really wanted it, you’d start right this moment. Everyone wants a simple fix and no one wants to work hard for what they want. This is why I admire other sober people and want to know more of them, because it would be so easy to just take that first drink, but every minute of every day has a purpose, to stay sober…and then every other minute finds a new, more meaningful purpose. We do things on purpose, is what I am getting at. I like that. In the words of good ‘ol Hitch, “Begin each day as if it were on purpose.”
  5. My problems are still here, only they’re easier to work through.
  6. I know who my true friends are.
  7. Most functions are pretty boring – I make a game out of these, too. I have to, living with my social butterfly of a husband. My social anxiety doesn’t help, but sure does set the stage for some challenging interactions, which then elude the boring-ness, but make me a nervous wreck!
  8. Most functions include alcohol – true dat!
  9. Drunk people are obnoxious idiots – I am usually not around for this phase anymore, but on the lucky occasion I happen to be, they either disgust me, make me oh so grateful that I am who I am, or sometimes they are actually funny…at their expense, of course.
  10. I have zero tolerance for drinking and driving – ZERO.
  11. I’m more aware of my surroundings.
  12. It’s hard for me to relax and unwind – this is a bothersome one because relaxation is the essence of life. The time to relax is when you don’t have time for it. Massages work tremendously well, but I don’t have the money, or I’d have one weekly. Working out does help. What I really want is the ability to better recognize when I’m in the middle of a crazy anxious frenzy (this happens daily and is on some level a panick attack, I believe), so I can take a deep breath and calm myself down somehow. Funny how relaxation doesn’t seem to come to me naturally.
  13. I am responsible for myself and answer only to myself.
  14. I remember what happened the night before – usually. I blame my current memory lapses on being a baby momma.
  15. I remember every sporting event I go to – not many people I know can say that!
  16. My bonds with some of my family and friends are stronger and more meaningful .
  17. Waking up clear-headed is an amazing way to start out the day.
  18. I still dream of getting trashed one day without consequence – it would be so nice to kick back with a few cold ones and let my brain get a little fuzzy while my worries and cares just drifted away for an afternoon…
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5 things I won’t miss about drinking

I love sobriety. 5 things I won’t miss about drinking:

  1. Hangovers – I remember thinking to myself, “Oh shit, how am I going to make it through the day?” “I don’t know if I can do this!” I dealt with this legitimate fear regularly. It was always accompanied with dizziness, irritability and a pounding head. And visual snow, fuzzy brain and scratchy throat. And thick tongue, dry lips, wool sweaters on my teeth and moderate dehydration. Good times.
  2. Fatigue – I was ALWAYS tired and worn down. I haven’t slept or felt this well-rested since early high school. Have I mentioned that I love sobriety?
  3. Paranoia – Knowing that I can’t EVER get a DUI is such an amazing feeling! I am free! I don’t have to hope for a drama-free evening anymore. Sobriety sure does have its benefits.
  4. Dishonesty – No one ever knew how much I really drank. I never lied to myself, just everyone that loves me. I thought I was so clever and crafty sometimes. I think alcoholics are dishonest to themselves, more than anyone. There’s so much rationalizing and externalizing. Denial is ugly.
  5. Regret – I can’t even get into this now. Alcohol cast its shadow on every single decision I ever made while I was drinking. Nothing was truly my own, yet I’m left with my lack of accountability to own up to.
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