Debunking the Dry Drunk

Somebody called me a “dry drunk” behind my back. That was over a year ago, but I’ve carried it with me ever since. It’s probably time to let this shit out because I’m getting pissed about still being pissed. I had to do some research, as I’d never heard of a dry drunk before. Turns out, I have a BIG problem with this label, so I want to raise awareness of its absurdity and potential for damage. It’s not helpful to anyone and needs to go away.

You can Google the shit out of “dry drunk” – it’s everywhere. It might seem like a simple term, but it’s riddled with bullshit. As I understand it, a dry drunk is someone who is abstaining from alcohol or drugs, but still hasn’t found inner-peace or happiness in life because they’re stuck in their old ways of thinking. The original term referred to a rare condition that can occur during the first few months of recovery — you stumble around like a sloppy drunk, even though you’re stone-cold sober. In reality, it’s an imaginary disease invented by A.A. and has evolved into a condescending slur, suggesting that the sober person is angry, resentful, and emotionally stagnant – surely on the verge of relapse. If you don’t do the twelve steps, you will likely suffer from this “condition”, according to many members of A.A. Legitimate recovery sites play into this fear and nonsense. They advise about “how to avoid dry drunk syndrome”, “signs you’re a dry drunk”, and “treatment for dry drunk syndrome”.

soberchrystal.comI take my sobriety seriously and no one is going to scoff at it on my watch.

Labeling someone in recovery as a “dry drunk” only feeds the stigma we are all trying so desperately to annihilate. It’s insulting and shameful, and sows the seeds of fear. Everyone judges; it’s human nature. But this is taking it too far. It’s a display of ignorance and makes my name-caller look like an evil piece of shit.

Hell yes, I call people names. But it’s usually contained within my vehicle, aimed at other drivers, and more than likely true. I never said I was perfect. If you’re on my ass, slowing down to merge, honking at a traffic light (wtf?!), not waving after I let you in, or performing a 10-point parking job at Costco, you’re a “dumb ass” (totally censored) and I would like you to eat shit. I get that I should probably tone it down, especially with kids in tow, but I consider my road rage a survival tool. This way my head doesn’t explode and we don’t have a parking lot derby on our hands. And let’s be real – there are a lot of stupid and rude people. You can't fix stupid. But, you can beat the shit out of it.When someone else’s lack of awareness slows me down, I release my fury in a Tourette-like fashion – quick, loud, and vulgar. After that, it’s out and I’m done. When assholes dare to speculate about MY sobriety, it simply isn’t overcome with an epic tongue lashing. We need change. There are sites like where one can go for help when it comes to addiction or an alcohol problem which is impacting their work and personal life.

I am privileged to be part of an amazing, brave, remarkable community of recovering addicts. We must support and celebrate each other on all paths, whether we understand.

I’ve compiled the following list of “symptoms” that dry drunks tend to portray. NOTE: I’m over 8 years into my recovery and still experience most of this stuff regularly. I don’t believe we should focus on trying to avoid it; we need to live it and learn. It’s absurd to assume that any sort of combination of these “symptoms” will inevitably lead to relapse.

“Symptom” Logic
Old patterns remain. This shit takes time. And some things never change. Patterns are hard to break and recovery requires patience. This does not mean you are on the verge of relapse.
Struggling in sobriety. If you’re struggling, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you are doing anything wrong. If it’s not a struggle, you’re probably a robot. I struggle often, which is the purpose of this blog and my Twitter account. For those in recovery there are endless resources, such as treatment centers, websites, books, and counselors – proving that everyone struggles in recovery.
Romancing the drink. This is when we remember all the good things about our drinking past. We push the pains we experienced as a result of our booze binges aside and daydreams dance through our heads like happily drunken rainbows and booze-soaked cotton candy. Who the hell doesn’t reminisce?! It’s totally normal to get caught up in these “enhanced” memories. They are moments that we all must work through and I don’t expect them to ever go away completely. Plus, I had some damn good times. I always get back around to embracing the reasons for and benefits of my sobriety.
Anxiety. If you don’t have anxiety about shit, how do you know if it’s important to you? I think anxiety is a necessary natural force that has alerted me of potential dangers, especially in early recovery. NOTE: There are a ton of alcoholics that have other shit going on, like other mental health issues they struggle with, as well as their addiction. Describing these people as dry drunks is stupid and makes me want to punch someone in the face.
Angry and resentful. Clearly, this is me. Often. Sometimes when my husband is drinking, talking about drinking or spending money on drinking, I want to chop his egg-shaped head off. Sure, anger and resentment blow, but they’re a work in progress and are stepping-stones. I’m not on the verge of relapse because I have domestic fits of rage. I may drive my husband to drink, but that’s a different story!
Jealousy. You can bet your sweet ass I’m jealous of the “normies”. It’s ugly, but it’s part of the deal. In some ways, I think jealousy has helped push me in the direction I want to move toward my own goals. In other ways, it makes me want to shove a half-drunken beer bottle up someone’s ass.
Being impatient or pursuing whims. I tend to exaggerate the importance and urgency of things to the point that I’m hostile. If I miss out on something because of someone else’s stupidity, it pisses me off. It’s not going to make me polish off a fifth of vodka, though. And I consider the ability to pursue a whim a beautiful thing.
Inability to make decisions. The only things I truly know are how I like my coffee and that I’m always hungry. I couldn’t decide on whether or not to comment further on this.
Detachment and self-absorption. These are survival skills! I think self-absorption is necessary while we’re relearning how to approach just about every single thought and feeling in our lives. Sobriety is an intense personal journey. I have to detach at times to keep my sanity.
Mood swings, trouble with expressing emotions, feeling unsatisfied. I’ve been a moody son of a bitch all my life – it is part of my charming personality. I have trouble expressing my emotions to others because I am socially retarded. And any time I feel unsatisfied, I see it as a kick in the ass to change something, no matter how long it takes me to realize. None of these are going to send me crawling into a liquor store.
Less participation in a 12-step program, or withdrawal from it completely. Suck it! Suck it right now!

We have the right to judge and say whatever we want, but I expect a healthy heart and mind in recovery to be a little more accepting and a little less spiteful. Maybe this name-calling is a coping mechanism because she (my name-caller) is scared to consider another path. The freedom of my 12-step-free journey requires self-awareness, self-empowerment, and accountability that she may not have the balls to explore. It’s natural to try to make sense of things that we don’t understand. She has been sober for over a year and still goes to two A.A. meetings per day. That shit boggles my damn mind. I’d be whacked to keep that up – my knuckles would probably glow in the dark! But I don’t know what it’s like to live in her world and I don’t need to understand. I am still proud as hell of her for staying sober all this time and support her journey moving forward. I expect more compassion and flexibility of my recovering peers. I expect more accountability.No one understands and that's ok

We all work really hard in sobriety. One more day sober is another amazing feat. We don’t know what anyone goes through every day. We don’t know how anyone feels. We don’t see the work people are doing on the inside. And we are not psychics or mind readers. Sometimes just staying sober is ok. It has to be – we’ve all been there. Recovery is likely the hardest thing we will ever have to live through. Can we please be a little gentler with each other and lose this label? There are lots of mysteries in recovery – focus on your own. If you don’t have something nice or supportive to say about someone else’s recovery, please keep your mouth shut. And maybe I’ll work on my road rage.

Thanks for reading,


Tagged : / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

46 thoughts on “Debunking the Dry Drunk

  1. But you sound so angry in your post! My goal in sobriety is not only to me sober but HAPPY & you do NOT sound happy. You actually sound extremely angry. No thanks.

    1. Hi Adrianne, thanks for taking the time to basically tell me to fuck off. How lovely. Of course I was angry in that post. Anger is actually a necessary and healthy emotion. I’m glad your goal in sobriety is to be sober and happy – isn’t that everyone’s? An angry post doesn’t mean I live an angry life. One of the intentions of this blog is to get all that angry shit out, so I can move on. Surely you understand how that works. When people who can relate to me comment, they appreciate me because I’m actually real and honest and in turn, I appreciate them. Just like anything and everything in life, my blog isn’t for everyone. Good luck in your sobriety.

      1. I just stumbled on this blog when I googled “dry drunk bullshit.” I went to my first meeting today since I got sober 5 years ago. I have spent the last 5 years dealing with my complex PTSD and drug-resistant depression. I have made a ton of progress through exercise, meditation, somatic therapy and reading. I am struggling now with a lot of emotional and health issues since the shutdown and realized that I now want to go to some AA meetings to hear some wisdom. I was called on to speak and mentioned that I haven’t gone to a meeting since getting sober 5 years ago. The leader’s response? “You know what we call people like that!” I laughed it off but I was sitting there after that thinking- this is why I don’t go to meetings. Not everyone fits into that mold and lots of us have a world of trauma and pain. I really hate the AA attitude that if you don’t go to meetings you’re going to end up dead or in a psych ward. Thank God there are so many alternatives now. Thanks for this post.😊

        1. Thanks so much for your comment, I truly appreciate it. And congrats on 5 years…that’s quite an accomplishment! Keep up the good work. Funny, I was just thinking about going to a meeting that’s held near my home. I see the cars coming and going weekly. Lately, I’ve wondered if the support might make me feel better. There’s always something I can take away, but your comment reminded me of the bullshit I’d have to tolerate and weed through. I’m sorry you felt you had to laugh it off. I would have too, and then I would have wrestled with the guilt and regret of not standing up for myself and others. Gah!

  2. We get sober through the steps we take and not the meetings we make or abinence alone. I am someone who has struggled greatly in sobriety and because of that I ended up relapsing time and time again. Now I understand that abstinence and staying dry was the reason. I didn’t have emotional sobriety and alcohol and drugs were never my problem. They were my solution to a discontentedness that plagued me since I was a wee one. I just never felt right and my life continued to stay unmanageable during periods of absitence and sobriety, whether I was going to meetings or not. I was told to identify and shoot for midnight.
    If that works for you, then God bless and keep on coming on, but I am the real alcoholic and without action my life continued to be cyclical and I was doomed to repeat my mistakes. My thinking didn’t change and I lived a fear based existence with little understanding of why I had those fears and that I was merely reacting to those fears and my fears with preconceived notions that remained unanalyzed and unchallenged. Again, this led to relapse and continued unmanageability for me.
    When I finally looked at my life on paper I realized that I acted as if I were the center of the universe and defaulted constantly to the hard wired notion that everything was happening to me. After doing some searching and fearless introspection I see now that my default is to be selfish and self centered, and I must actively seek out a daily reprieve from this state in which I am so normally inclined. Self knowledge of this avails me nothing unless I remain vigorous and mindful of my behaviors and thinking and realize where I am selfish self seeking, dishonest and afraid. I need to be mindful of how my actions reverberate in the lives of those around me and that if I continue to react to fears rather than consciously try to emulate how my best self should act I am doomed to continue to be spiritually misaligned with the world and those around me. I will slip into anxious depression and seek out a solution in alcohol and drugs as being an alcoholic that is the quick fix to my troubles. However, at this progressive state of my alcoholism the wheels come off quickly and I find myself homeless, unemployed, miserable and alone. I have a mind that tells me one or two drinks can’t hurt and knowledge of that is still not enough to prevent me from picking up once my emotional life is distances through solution based thinking. If I continue to hold on while my emotional self is running riot then I am no longer emotionally content and am as sick as I ever was drunk. I destroy myself and those around me without regard. I have obsessive thoughts that can’t respond to reason. No human will is going to relieve me from these troubles, no medications or drugs alone. I must seek out something larger than myself so that I can assimilate into a world where I am not primarily concerned with being its center and be fearful of what I do and how others perceive me. There is a solution and I’m blessed to have finally found and been led to what that means and I would rather be hopelessly active than blindly lost repeating the same cycles and not having principles by which I can find a balance between manageability. We are men and women who recover from a hopeless state of mind and body and my inner spiritual existence is only relived through right course and right action. I hope that everyone finds this in their journeys and that they can get to a place where we together support each other through a simple plan of action. Faith without works is dead.
    I am a free man today. I can be surrounded by alcohol so long as I have a purpose to be in that specific situation. I have a purpose and those small purposes where I can be useful avail me greater purpose and I am finally happy for the first time since I can remember.

    1. Well, I’m about 5 months late in reading my comments – but damn, you are most certainly self-aware and it sounds like you’re on your right track now. I’m happy for you – thanks so much for sharing. – Chrystal

  3. All,
    I am a new grateful member if AA.
    It’s 52 days sober for me.
    It has been my expierence that as a newcomer, I have been totally embraced and encouraged as I come alive, after years of denial, lack of self care, impulsiveness etc..,
    A A is not the only way ..and I love the program. Today there are many choices. AA is helping me see what needs adjustment and healing, and what is no longer serving me. But the most important thing it presents is the reconnection with spirit, which leads to a soul sickness that is devestating.
    If I have to carry around for the rest of my life, those painful and sick behaviors, I would probably end up in a really deep hole.with no way out,
    The drunk who deliberately does not work on those behaviors in a daily meditation and prayer, in my opinion, is an ugly thing. I lived with 2 of those types of people. It’s crazy making and painful, to all in their path. Case in point, my dad growing up. No picnic , nobody win.

  4. Hi again Crystal,I had to respond to your last post as I am very glad to hear of your positive experience at your last meeting! I think aa addresses one thing and that is when you come to the difficult reality that you want a place to go and share and stop the nonsense.
    I did have some wine on a mountain in march however the booze has lost it’s energy for me,was ok to celebrate though.I don’t think that means anybody do that though, I think it’s also different for every different soul.There is a 1 hr. documentary on this by David Suzuki of the nature of things called “wasted” and is very diplomatic about the aa issue. A must watch I think.
    I did bawl my guts out at one meeting and maybe that was some of the energy needed to be must not give this liquid energy,to take away all ones power I think is why aa has a problem,Constantly going thru your negative past has me a little concerned that this is exactly what you need for relapse? I don’t even think booze is a very great high as well, only seems to heighten the difficulties of ones troubles,hilights them later on. And it’s the legal drug!!?? haha.
    To shun and think there is a monopoly on treatment will only drive people away,to protect a theology instead of helping will only make everything worse, 24 hrs is a good idea however,this moment is not to be inferior to the next, it is the moment to be cherished not thinking the next moment will be superior to this one ! As in the power of NOW! Thanks again, this is a great website for another way to help people!! Larry

  5. Thanks for your post Chrystal! I believe my sobriety, now only 9 months, is more important than AA and its labelling. I have mentioned to them that this is a hindrance, especially to us newcomers. Had to answer this as it is important for us to be nice if one is Not Drinking!Went in 2 days after my birthday to start anew, feels I’m an outcast but maybe I shouldn’t have backed off with how I feel they shouldn’t keep saying “you will drink again and die if you don’t follow the steps”, and there is “nothing worse than a dry drunk”.
    Also heard a threat from a member how he doesn’t care if he goes to jail if he catches someone 13-stepping!!?
    I only went there to stop drinking, trust me that step was not on my mind, plus I had to find out even what it was!!?
    Maybe it’s just bad luck or something with me, I don’t know, but I must stress and did with them as well that one must do what works. I wish all the best to what works for all with all addictions in and out of AA.
    Drinking is a symptom. I love hearing of meaningfull solutions and this helped me a lot, Thanks Chrystal! Larry

    1. Hey Larry, congrats on 9 months! That’s huge! I’m sorry to hear about your experiences in AA. I can’t believe they said that to your face?! That’s a tough position to be in when all you want is support…I don’t think it’s bad luck, I just think there are a lot of freaks out there who can’t get past the idea that someone can possibly get and stay sober another way. Or they’re all assholes – maybe a bit of both. I guarantee you there were people in that meeting who did not feel the same, it’s just hard for some to speak out, especially in such an inflexible, unaccepting, and hostile environment. I actually went to a meeting last week for the first time in many years…it was nothing like that and I actually stood up and shared that I hadn’t done any steps, never had a sponsor, and that after 9 years of sobriety, I was grateful to feel welcomed into the room and be amongst people who wanted to be better. It felt sooooooooooooo good! I had 3 different people come up to me afterward and introduce themselves and congratulate me. We have to speak up, Larry, so all others who are lost can find their way! Keep up the great work, I’m proud of you. -Chrystal

  6. Your blog post is the first thing that’s made me laugh in a while. I made the decision to stop drinking and be sober (only) 3 weeks ago and am so glad I’ve done it finally. As I go online and enjoy reading other people’s journeys in sobriety, I stumbled upon “dry drunk syndrome” and began focusing on that fear. Googled “how to avoid dry drunk” obsessively and well…been getting frustrated and mad. Your post here didn’t make me think “ok yeah I’m fine, it’s nothing” which would be dismissive I know, it instead made me think “oh yeah…I don’t have to totally numb myself down into this other person, I can be me ALSO”.
    Thank you for writing it, I will be looking more on your site hoping you have more info on your journey! Good on ya for 8 years, that is so great, to many more….

  7. Just stumbled upon this and cannot agree with you more; I used to attend AA meetings and the “dry drunk” accusations of members used to irritate me, so much for not taking other peoples inventories. Meetings do not work for everyone, I left AA, and I will be 2 years sober in Oct. Congratulations on the sobriety keep it up!

  8. I really appreciate what you are saying in this piece. I find the term bothersome and accusatory as well. I stopped for many reasons and they’re really no one else’s business. Rehashing the old stuff in meetings ad nauseam wouldn’t work for me. Not talking about it too much actually does work. Hearing others discuss it doesn’t help much either. I care very little for the praise or condemnation of others; everyone has a problem with recovery because they are, in effect, accusing you of some sort of moral weakness. Perhaps puffing themselves up in the process, or not. I can take solace in my own counsel understanding that some days are better than others. Thanks again. I will re-visit the site to see what’s up periodically.

    1. Thank you, Len! I feel ya. Congrats on your recovery. Thanks so much for taking the time to leave a comment. I appreciate knowing that someone out there has actually heard me and can relate.

  9. I got sober in 1989 and people threw this term around all the time and it terrified me. But as the years went on I realized the people using the term the most were the ones who had something to prove. Not me!! Now with 25 yrs. Sober I realize what a bullshit scare tactic term it really is and holds people back by making them question EVERYTHING!!! No relapses ever. Proud sober woman!!! Was thrilled to see this article written so perfectly

    1. Thank you, THANK YOU, Debra!!! Ahhh makes me feel alive! It’s THEM (the name-callers) who have something to prove! I can’t thank you enough for taking the time to comment. I SO appreciate it. It’s another reminder that I’m not alone. 25 years of continuous sobriety is incredible. I salute you, my friend! Keep up the great work…and we all know the work never ends…you are awesome!!!

  10. Chrystal,

    I REALLY appreciate your honesty. It seems to me that you encountered AA parrots who believe that people need to work a program their way and stay sober how they stay sober. When you deviate from how these parrots think you should work your program, they award you with the designation of ‘dry drunk’. I agree with your sentiment that this label tends to only reinforce the stigma we want to avoid.

    I’ve been practicing as a clinician for over 30 years and have found the idea of a ‘dry drunk’ to be a manifestation of AA or counselors that rely on the concepts of AA to teach recovery. I’m not exactly sure how labeling someone a dry drunk furthers recovery.

    It seems to me that if we’re going to support people to have a different experience around recovery we need to change the conversation…and that begins with eliminating the trite phrases bantered around the rooms of 12-step meetings.

    I’m not a fan of AA – when people cite the success of AA my sense is that many times people often confuse most successful with most popular.

    I’ve read your blog for some time. You seem to have a great handle on what is needed to stay sober. I would invite you to continue doing what engages you, and continue speaking up when people try to paint you into a corner or tell you how to live your life. While I don’t spend time with people who behave like this, they save me time as their behavior gives me a sense of who they are so I don’t waste my time.

    Good luck on your path.

    1. Thank you SO much, Todd! I’ve always appreciated your support and am glad we are connected. You’re so right – we need to change the conversation, otherwise those trite phrases will continue to feed the stigma and limit recovery. I’m taking it on! Nobody puts Baby in a corner! 😉

  11. When someone else takes your inventory, the particular favor they are doing you is what I call the “example of how not to do it.”

    Slowly I’m learning it’s not my job to take your inventory, or his, or hers, or anyone else’s.

    Not an easy thing to learn.

    1. I agree, Cecile. And I do appreciate those examples…they keep me on my toes! Good to hear from you!

  12. So many people should read this post. Those who use the term have no idea the extent of damage they cause by labelling someone who is already going through so much.

    I have just embarked on my recovery journey and recall a dissapointing AA meeting where I was told that without the 12 step programme I’d just be a dry drunk. This label perpetuates the discouragement and judgement felt by alcoholics.

    Thank you for writing this.

    1. Thank you for your response! Im glad this post struck a cord with you and know exactly how you feel. Best thoughts to you as you continue on your recovery journey. We are not alone! Chrystal

  13. I have been sober for 19 months and I too am annoyed when someone raises an eyebrow (and mutters under their breath, “Dry Drunk”) when I say I occasionally get cravings for alcohol… As if true sobriety means you can magically “correct” years of classical conditioning. As if there is a correct way to get and stay sober… Leaving a three bottle of wine a day habit was HARD, and although I am not particularly enthusiastic or gloating about my sobriety, it is MY SOBRIETY. How I got there and stay there is my business.

    Thank you for this post.

    1. What a powerful response! Thank you for reading my blog. Congratulations to you for paving your own way. You totally sound like a badass! Stay strong. You are not alone! Chrystal

  14. I’m going to have to unlike Sober Mommies. So far this page has shown me a lot of sobriety but no recovery. Case in point, this post. I am going to have to have a lengthy talk about this with my sponsor because even posting this goes against every principle that I’ve learned in AA. Principles, for example, like “live and let live.” Are you are offended by the term “dry drunk” and think somehow because the term is offensive that it is stigmatizing and somehow unreal? As a woman in recovery who grew up with a “dry drunk” and yes, to me it was VERY real. As a woman who also lived with a dry drunk for two years and still admittedly struggles with a lot of those horrible, soul crushing symptoms herself, I think that this post is incredibly small minded and irresponsible. That’s my humble opinion.

    1. Thank you for reading my blog and for your response. I thinks it’s wonderful that this post will spurn conversations with your sponsor through your recovery. If AA works for you, that is fantastic. This post is my opinion. I wish you all the best in your recovery and truly hope you maintain your sobriety. Chrystal

    2. I’ve read this post a few times, and I find myself returning to this comment in particular. I’m not sure, but I think it is because your response to Chrystal’s blog post reminds me a lot of how I know I would’ve responded had I read this earlier on in my recovery. I was absolutely terrified and completely lost when I had to quit drinking. My whole world changed and I was a big ball of withdrawal having, anxiety ridden confusion walking around in human form. So when I found AA, I clung to it desperately and depended heavily upon it to just keep breathing, to avoid living in the hell of what I can only describe as one continuous, never ending panic attack. AA brought me relief from that hell, and as a result I subscribed 100% to everything I learned in meetings, regardless of validity or noticeable contradictions. It kept me alive, semi-sane, and sober, and that was all that really mattered at that time. Years later…I still attend AA. I still believe that it’s basic principles, suggested steps, and loving fellowship play a huge part in my continued sobriety. But I’ve learned not to subscribe to every notion or belief I’ve encountered in the rooms. And, in retrospect, I’m able to see how judgemental and closed minded I was in that early recovery phase. When I automatically adopted and accepted every idea presented to me as the one and only “true way” to recover, I was closing myself off from so many wonderful possibilities and experiences that sobriety has to offer. I would have missed out on so much had I remained convinced that AA had a monopoly on “real” recovery. And I certainly wouldn’t have ever been introduced to Sober Mommies, which has led me to the truly supportive and phenomenal group of women I am now blessed enough to call my true friends. I’m not sure if you were misinformed, or if you perhaps misunderstood the purpose (or at least what I understand the purpose to be) of the Sober Mommies community- to provide a safe and judgement free place for those who wish to recover from addiction, by whatever means they see fit, to gather to share their experiences and offer their love and support to one another. Of course I am only speaking for myself here and not on anyone else’s behalf, but I do hope you will attempt to see what the site does have to offer, even if it’s not strictly based on a 12 step program, before you “unlike”. I’d sure hate to have missed out on all it has contributed to my personal recovery experience.

      1. Couldn’t have said it any better, Raegan. Sober Mommies is all about acceptance. Isn’t that what we all want in life?! It’s there for the taking, always. I’m so happy to hear from people who can relate to me and from people who can’t, but support me anyway. Feels amazing. Thanks so much for taking the time to read my story and to respond. Let’s just keep spreading the word that there’s more than one way to recover! Have a great day recovering your way. 🙂

  15. Thank you… I have hated that term for the 20 years of my sobriety and continue to go through many of the different things you listed above. That is LIFE.. that is REALITY. I think people use the term more so to call out people who do not go to meetings and make an assumption of where they are at. Thank God it is progress not perfection, huh? I need to remember that we all have our shit and what people say about me is none of my business.. even when I want to rip their throats out 😉 I just found your blog tonight… going to explore….

    1. I’m so happy you found me! I hope my experiences can help in some way. Let me know what you think. I really appreciate your comment – nice to know that there are people out there who “get” me. We are not alone! Chrystal

  16. Ummm, THANK YOU!! I couldn’t have said it better and I feel the same way… I’m so tired of being made to feel guilty for not gorging myself on meetings and feeling FEELINGS; a lot of them… Anxiety and anger the whole gamut. I love reading your posts, helps me feel okay with working my program the way that works for ME… Thank you:)

    1. Erin, thank YOU. I love hearing that someone else is working their OWN program successfully! Hopefully we can get the word out that there’s more than one way to do it and NONE of them are wrong! Congratulations to you. Keep up the great work! Thank you so much for commenting.

  17. I’m a “normie” as you would call me- but my mother was an alcoholic and I’ve been through the wringer in my lifetime with her.

    I just wanted to comment and say the concept of a “dry drunk” is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. Reading that list of signs – you can apply those to ANYONE or ANYTHING. Case in point, while I was reading the “romanticizing” section I thought about all of the women I know who escaped DV relationships – where the dude very nearly killed them- and STILL think back to when things were great in the relationship, and they loved him.

    We all do it. All of us. No matter what. So I guess everyone in the world is a dry drunk. Stupid. Stupid.

    Thanks for writing this- getting some awareness out there.

    1. Thank YOU, Starr. Feels good to know that someone else agrees with me. I hope it does increase some awareness out there…
      BTW, I just signed up for notifications on YOUR blog! Good stuff. Have a great day. 🙂

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.